Five things I’ve learned by living alone

Eight months have gone so fast! Now I’m preparing myself for a new adventure, a new beginning.

In just ten days I will move to the place that will be my home for the next three months: New York. This has made me think about the amazing months I’ve had in Italy and all the things that I have learned.

With every experience we have, we grow and we change. Even if we don’t want to change, our mind and our senses absorb every little detail or fact and make it part of our background. Suddenly we see ourselves thinking in a different way, more mature, doing things we didn’t imagine we were going to do, speaking in a different language…and sometimes thinking in that language even if it’s not your mother tongue.

I consider myself a very analytic person and reflecting about the things that happen in my life is a sort of therapy. It helps me to put some order on my thoughts. That’s why I decided to write this post about the five things that I have learned in the past 8 months in my first experience alone:

 

1. There is no ideal place to live. Yes, that’s it! I came to Italy because I was disappointed of the Venezuelan situation: the violence on the streets, the corruption, the burocracy, the constant fear of losing everything you have worked for in just three minutes. Many of these things don’t exist in Italy and that’s great, but here you have different problems. Burocracy is as bad as the Venezuelan one, people think all the time in a negative way about the country and live in a sort of depression that goes beyond the economic aspect. Needless to say that the economy has hit the country very hard, especially the younger population. Many young and talented citizens, with a tremendous academic record, can’t find a decent job and sometimes they don’t get paid for what they do. Now I’m preparing myself to go to the United States and I know that it won’t be a bed of roses. There is also the economic crisis and I’m not an American citizen, so I will have to face discrimination and all kinds of prejudices. But, you know what, I want to try and nobody will stop me!

2. I can’t plan anything. I think I have lost a bit of the illusion of control. I always bring with me my agenda where I write everything I have to do for the rest of the week…even the most absurd and evident things. But it happened to me that two weeks ago I didn’t know really if I was going to obtain my Visa to go to the USA. I had to pay the rent of my apartment for the month of June and then I had to leave it because is going to be sold. So, I found myself in a very difficult situation because my life depended on someone else. I couldn’t buy travel tickets because I wasn’t certain about taking the plane, and I couldn’t start looking for a new apartment in Milan because I didn’t know if I was going to stay in the city. I just had to wait. Now I know I’m going to NY for three months. What will I do later? I don’t know. Time will give me the answer

3. I realized I’m calmer than the rest of people I have found here. Some of my new friends in Milan have told me that if they would have faced what I have in the last months (the uncertainty about my future) they would have become mad. The fact is that I was really worried about my internship in New York, but I have learned that certain things are not under our control. So, if you can change things, do it! If you can’t, don’t worry because it’s not your fault and you can’t do anything about it.

4. I am more open to other cultures than many people I have met. In Venezuela, I was always complaining because people tend to be very focus about national issues and they ignore other cultures or what’s happening outside of the country. I have realized that in Italy the situation is not better. Here I have found people that don’t know where Venezuela is or people that ignore that Toronto is part of Canada and not the USA and so on…Now in America I know I will find the same situation. So, I have to thank God and my parents because I think they gave me a good education background that allows me to interact with people of Latin America about our problems and also understand European political dynamics and how the North American system works. And believe me, if you are studying International Relations, the ability to communicate with different cultures and to understand what they are expecting form you is a plus

5. Last but not less important…I have learned how to cook, how to wash my clothes, how to rent an apartment, how to prepare a bag, how to choose my flatmates and how to start somewhere else from zero. And that makes me very proud.

So, do you have some experiences like this? I want to hear from you. Please, leave a comment.

The Illusion of Control

Today I want to share with you this article I read on the Zen Habits blog, which I completely recommend. This article arrived to me in a very important time in my life.

I really needed to read something like this that day. Sometimes, we are so busy planning our life that we don't realise that we are like the feathers in the Forrest Gump film...we are moving with the wind. Enjoy your reading!

The Illusion of Control

Post written by Leo Babauta

When you think you control something, you’re wrong.

It’s amazing how often we think we’re in control of something when really we aren’t.

Control is an illusion, as I’ve said many times before.

We constantly make plans that never actually turn out the way we envisioned. ‘If you want to make God laugh, make a plan,’ an old saying goes.

We have been trained to set goals, and then work on the actions that lead to those goals … and yet how often do those goals fail? How often are we trying to control a future that we cannot predict?

Did you know five years ago that the world would turn out as it has — that Obama would be president, that the stock markets would have crashed, that we’d be deep into a recession, that earthquakes and tsunamis would hit, that you’d be doing exactly what you’re doing today?

Of course not. We don’t know the future, much less control it. We like to think we do, but that never turns out to be true.

And yet we continue to believe in the illusion of control. We face a chaotic and complex world, and seek to control it however we can.

Our attempts to control the world can be seen through:

•Trying to control how our children turn out, as if we can shape them like blocks of clay, as if humans aren’t more complex than we can possibly understand.

•Tracking every little thing, from spending to exercise to what we eat to what tasks we do to how many visitors are on our site to how many steps we’ve taken today and how many miles we’ve run. As if our selective tracking can possibly include the many, complex factors that influence outcomes.

•Trying to control employees — again, complex human beings with many motivations and whims and habits that we don’t understand.

•Obsessively planning projects, trips, days, parties, as if the outcomes of events are things we can control with our powers of manipulation of the world.

If we can let go of this illusion, what are we left with? How can we live among this chaos?

Consider the fish. A fish swims in a chaotic sea that it cannot possibly control — much as we all do. The fish, unlike us, is under no illusion that it controls the sea, or other fish in the sea. The fish doesn’t even try to control where it ends up — it just swims, either going with the flow or dealing with the flow as it comes. It eats, and hides, and mates, but does not try to control a thing.

We are no better than that fish, yet our thinking creates the need for an illusion.

Let go of that thinking. Learn to be the fish.

When we are in the midst of chaos, let go of the need to control it. Be awash in it, experience it in that moment, try not to control the outcome but deal with the flow as it comes.

How do we live our lives like this? It’s a completely different way of living, once we let go of the illusion:

•We stop setting goals, and instead do what excites us.

•We stop planning, and just do.

•We stop looking at the future, and live in the moment.

•We stop trying to control others, and focus instead on being kind to them.

•We learn that trusting our values is more important to taking action than desiring and striving for certain outcomes.

•We take each step lightly, with balance, in the moment, guided by those values and what we’re passionate about … rather than trying to plan the next 1,000 steps and where we’ll end up.

•We learn to accept the world as it is, rather than being annoyed with it, stressed by it, mad at it, despaired by it, or trying to change it into what we want it to be.

•We are never disappointed with how things turn out, because we never expected anything — we just accept what comes.

This might seem like a passive way of living to some, and it’s against our aggressive, productive, goal-oriented cultural nature. If you can’t accept this way of living, that’s OK — many people live their lives with the illusion of control, and not realizing what it is that makes them unhappy or frustrated isn’t the worst thing ever.

But if you can learn to live this way … it’s the most freeing thing in the world.

http://zenhabits.net/control/

A great interview from San Francisco

Today I'm so glad to share with all of you the interview I gave to the talented journalist from San Francisco, Ama Simone Miller. We discussed about social media, the evolution of journalism and we made a comparison between the way journalism is made in USA, Italy and Venezuela. You can read her blog  http://asimiller.wordpress.com/ and follow her on Twitter at: http://www.twitter.com/mychasi. Enjoy your reading!

Interview with José Domingo Guariglia

AMA SIMONE MILLER

José Domingo Guariglia – journalist, blogger, and broadcaster. So announces his LinkedIn headline, and looking at his LinkedIn profile, he’s filled those shoes. He agreed to be interviewed; below is talk on blogging, differences in news styles between countries, journalism, and more!

What kind of journalist are you? How would you describe the type of work you do/want to do?

Since I got my degree I’ve been working in online journalism. I used to work as the Coordinator of a website in Venezuela ( http://www.globovision.com/ ). This is the website of a local TV network specialised in news 24 hours a day. My work consisted in writing the news that were going to be published on the website and coordinate the rest of the writers and the distribution of the contents along the site. Since November I quit and I moved to Italy where I’m finishing my studies in Communication for International Relations. I want to focus on international journalism

What made you want to enter the field?

I’ve always liked to write and I consider myself a very curious person. When I had to decide what to do for the rest of my life, I thought that Mass Communications was a broad career that offered me a lot of prospectives and I’m happy with my choice.

On your LinkedIn profile, it shows that you’ve studied for three different degrees: Mass Communications/Journalism, Broadcasting, and a Masters for Communication for International Relations in the works. How has each of these degrees supplemented your career and work?

Mass Communications is my Degree. I consider myself a communicator, first of all. During those five years of study I learned a lot of things that I have used in my work experience, but it is also true that all that knowledge is very wide and today, if you want to be competitive in the work market, you need to specialise in something.

I’ve always been attracted in multiculturalism, languages, travel around the world and cross-cultural communication and I had a class in International Information at university that I really enjoyed. So, for me, the best decision was to specialise in the international field. That’s why I chose the Master in Communication for International Relations. I really hope to start working in an international media very soon.

About the Broadcasting course, I can tell you that I also like the work on camera and the many dimensions you can give to your voice when you work on the radio. At university I didn’t have the opportunity to explore the multimedia side of journalism, and so this course was important to fill that part.

How do you work with social media (FaceBook, Twitter, blogs, etc)?

When I was working I constantly used social media. In fact, part of my work was to keep updated the Twitter and the Facebook accounts of the TV network. Today online journalism is more than web sites. If you don’t have a presence in social networks, your impact as a media will be very limited. Now that I’m not working, I use social media to keep myself informed about what’s happening in the world in a fast way. On Twitter I follow all the media that interest me and I also share with my contacts those news that I think that could be useful. I also have a blog http://proudnomad.blogspot.com/ but is more a sort of diary of what I’m doing and what I think.

What do you think social media’s role will be in the future of journalism?

I think that media should understand that the industry has changed completely. Now the media are not the only owners of the information. People is also an important source and social networks have given the power to the people. Nevertheless, the work of a journalist will always be important to select and classify the information that comes from different sources at the same time.

Do you think ‘old school journalism’, like print newspapers and news networks, will be around in twenty-thirty years? Why or why not?

Yes, I’m sure they will be around, but they will need to redesign their role, to change in order to keep the new audiences attracted.Maybe, use more graphics and photos instead of whole pages with text and concentrate more in the analysis of the facts and not in the news that everybody could find on the internet. The history of journalism has taught us that new media doesn’t eliminate the old ones but they become complementary. That’s why today we have printed media, radio, TV, magazines and internet.

In American journalism, there seems to be a lot of pressure for journalists to be absolutely neutral and avoiding showing a preference towards one side or another in articles and news reports. Is the same true in Venezuela or Italy? From what you’ve experience, what’s the ‘standard’ journalism style of the countries you’ve worked and studied in?

Well, I can tell you that in Venezuela and Italy the situation is very different from the American way of making journalism. Italy and Venezuela have many differences but I have seen that in both countries the politics take all the news agenda. Media only talk about politics and both societies are very divided. Journalism has suffered a lot in this situation because the media have become part of the game. So you can find media that are supporting the government in a very obvious way and some that are against the government and sometimes tend to exaggerate the facts to make the government look worse. In both Venezuela and Italy, journalism is not based on objectivity and people know that. In the end, people only read the newspaper that reflects his or her opinions and this doesn’t contribute to the analysis of ideas that journalism should inspire and promote. In TV and radio, I have seen that there is a tendency to make entertainment shows and avoid politics.

About your blog, Proud Nomad – what inspires you to blog?

I had a previous blog called Equilibrio Radical and it was only in Spanish. I used it as a way to promote all the materials I was writing for different media. It was a sort of portfolio of my work. Two months ago, I realized that I needed to refresh it because all this year I’ve been travelling and knowing people from different parts of the world that don’t understand Spanish. Suddenly I realized that I have become international and that my blog should be international too. So I thought about the possibility of changing the name, the address, the language and the purpose of my blog. Now, it has become a diary, a space where I can explain myself and try to understand what’s coming to my mind. It’s like a therapy.

And finally, a bit unrelated…if you could go anywhere for a month, where would you go?

I have no doubts about this one. I would go to NY. It’s my favorite city in the world and it’s the place where everything happens. For a journalist it’s the perfect environment. I like the chaos that you feel when you go to a city like NY. There you feel you are alive…

"I had the feeling that I belonged...that I could be someone"

We all have one song that has the ability to transport us to a different reality or to reflect our current situation. I'm a music lover and for that reason I listen to a lot of music from different genres. In my iPod you can find more than 1,000 songs performed by artists from all over the world: from the sweet Italian singer Laura Pausini to the American rock bands My Chemical Romance and Linkin' Park and the soul of Amy Winehouse and Ray Charles.

But there is one song that I really like and I've been fascinated about it since I was a little kid. It is Fast Car from Tracy Chapman.

When I was a kid I didn't know a word of English and I couldn't understand the lyrics but the great voice of Tracy amazed me. She's so expressive! It's true the fact that music goes beyond languages and cultures.

A few years ago I rediscovered this amazing song and I paid attention to the lyrics. Fast Car is a song that talks about the vicious circle that many poor families live in North America, but also in the rest of the world. It's about living in a disfunctional family and the will to escape, to try to improve in life and become a better person. In the end, the sons repeat the same mistakes of their parents or at least it seems.

The song is a jewel in the memorable repertoire of this gifted American singer and it's a classical Chapman composition. The singer from Ohio has always written songs about poverty, racism and human rights. The curious thing is that the album where this song was included was released when she only was 24 years old!

Fast Car is a very mature song. It was the first single of her homonymous album released in 1988 but the song is more actual than ever.

Chapman, Grammy winner, started making songs in 1980 when she was still studying Anthropology and African Studies in Massachusets. Her voice started being known to the public when she participated in a concert for Nelson Mandela's birthday in 1988.

I personally feel part of this song, not because I had lived in a situation like that. My family is perfect and I'm so blessed for that. But I think that deep inside this song talks about freedom and youth and how sometimes our goals when we are young are blocked because of the circumstances. It's about taking risks at the right moment in the middle of the uncertainty.

One of the parts that I really love of this song is when Tracy says: "I had a feeling that I belonged...I had a feeling I could be someone". Enjoy it!

FAST CAR

We miss you, Bob

On May 11th 2011, after exactly 30 years from Bob Marley's death, the Grammy Museum opened a new exhibit called "Messenger" dedicated to the King of Reggae, Bob Marley, in downtown Los Angeles. The exhibit analyses the character from all his perspectives: as a spiritual man, as a composer, as a performer and as an intellectual. In a certain way, Marley represented each of those things.

The exhibit shows more than 40 objects from the Marley family and photographs that try to explain the geniality behind the man that died at 36 years old and became a legend.

The author of songs such as One Love and No Woman No Cry was one of a kind. His soft voice represented the demands of milions of people that were asking for changes in the Third World.

With his soul, his great mind and his fight for peace, the rise of Africa and human rights Bob Marley went beyond generations and now he has more followers than ever.

Robert Nesta Marley was born on February 6th 1945, in Nine Mile, a little town in northern Jamaica. Because of his poor origins, he couldn't imagine he was meant to be one of the music legends of the century.

His music was deeply influenced by the Rastafarí religion, which reunites Bible profecies, naturalism and the defense of black people agains racism.

Marley, like John Lennon, was also known as a pacifist and he was concerned about the social issues of his time. He once said: "We should really love each other in peace and harmony, instead we're fussin' n fighting like we ain't supposed to be".

I think the world could be so much better with thousands of Bob Marley, Don't you think the same?

MY FAVORITE BOB MARLEY'S SONG: NO WOMAN NO CRY